Wednesday 3 October 2012

The Ness Tunnel at Shaldon; A poem

The Ness Tunnel, Shaldon

 
Walk straight ahead.
Take the first turn on the right;
You can’t miss it,
It’s the only turn
Of course you’ll be alright.

Once around the corner
You will see just where to go.
Watch the steps
They can be slippy.
Just head straight for the light.

At the tunnels end
Find a secluded beach;
But the cliffs
May not be stable,
So take care, enjoy the sights.


This tunnel known locally as the smugglers tunnel was built to service a lime kiln built into a rocky cliff which separates the beach from the area beyond. Lime was landed on the beach and transported through the tunnel along with other goods. During WW2, the tunnel was blocked by causing a roof fall. This is still the case but another exit to the beach was built a little distance away for use by holiday-makers and the local populous to enable this secluded and private beach to be used.

Not sure if I am happy with this at all. Lack of rhyme and structure leaves me very unhappy buut I shall persevere and see how far I can get before needing to revisit objectives.

PS just changed the last lines of the second and third verse, is it an improvement?

Once around the corner
You will see just where to go.
Watch the steps
They can be slippy.
Just straight ahead, you'll know.

At the tunnels end
Find a secluded beach;
But the cliffs
May not be stable,
So take care, stay out of reach.

I think I find it an improvement but it does not give the punchy modern style which I think I am aiming for. But then again, neither did the original, LOL. Oh well c'est la vie.

1 comment:

  1. Hey John!
    I like both versions! I didn't know you wrote poetry!
    Thanks for sharing this blog... I'll start following you!
    Lotus

    ReplyDelete